Sunday, June 03, 2007

Maybe Latawnya turned to drugs when she realized her mother was addle brained?

I was hanging out with a darling friend yesterday and she felt the need to show me this little children's lit gem.

Some questions though-

How does a horse light a joint?

How does a horse open a bottle of whiskey?

Why aren't horses shooting horse instead of smoking joints?

Is the line "Then Daisy slapped the alcohol and drugs out of Latawnya's hoof" The. Best. Line. Ever?

In the end I laughed so hard I cried and thought I needed to have my appendix removed from the laughter induced stomach cramps.

In the interest of full disclosure- I read this story while preparing a nalgene bottle full of vodka and juice to bring to a show. We saw the Diminished Men- a fab local band that does a spaghetti western surf rock thing and has one hell of a drummer. We also brought a flask full of rum and chain smoked through the show. Latawnya's mother would be very unhappy. Latawnya's daddy would have shown us the rotting corpse of his overdosed horse friend. Latawnya's sisters would have slapped the booze out of our hands. We don't know what Latawnya's brother Gregory would have done, because though he is mentioned in the book we have no idea if Gregory would approve of our alcohol fueled Rock N Roll lifestyle.

(The author would like to thank the Flying Spaghetti Monster for nalgene bottles full of vodka and juice. "Thank you Fllying Spaghetti Monster!)


Brave Sir Robin said...


Brave Sir Robin would never slap alcohol out of your hand. He might however bogart the nalgene bottle however.

The Red Queen said...

No bogarting of tastee alcoholic beverages allowed- but I would share if asked nicely.

Anonymous said...

Mmmmmmm.... vodka and juice and rum and chain smoking!! You guys wanna come play some smoking games and drinking games?? Don't tell Latoya though, or she'll slap that shit right out of your hoof!