Wednesday, May 23, 2007

The general act of living is not material for your jack-off sessions

I am, as most of you know, not the kind of girl generally struck mute the stupid actions of misogynist boys. There’s enough pissed off righteousness in me to call out egregious actions for the benefit of any other girl in a 1000 yard radius, But lately I have found myself unable to call out a certain behavior that pisses me off to no end- the Look Up.

The Look Up is when a boy takes that 30 second long look at you starting with your legs and ending at your tits. They never, ever look you in the eyes until they’ve finished their examination and decided that you are a fuckable object. Maybe you guys think this is flattering, but it’s creepy.

This always happens when I am minding my own business, like standing in line at the grocery store. It happened the other day when I was walking to the end of my driveway (shared with all the other apartments) to meet a friend who was having a hard time finding my building. The guy literally blocked my path so he could get his full mental porn image before I could go on with my business.

You boys may think that this is basically harmless, I should feel flattered to get the attention, maybe just write it off as a socially awkward moment with a guy who has no idea how to get a girl. But that is not how it feels on the receiving end.

The Look Up makes me (me of all fucking people) feel like a powerless hunk of meat. Calling out a boy who is yelling stupid things on the side of the street is easy, but telling someone to stop looking at you is different. Without saying a single word these boys put you in your place and keep you there until they are finished. It doesn’t matter that you weren’t looking for attention, or that you are trying to do other things, or that never in a million years would the boy who is doing the looking get to see you naked. It doesn’t matter that you are just trying to buy groceries for dinner with your kid standing right next to you. You have no choice but to let the guy take a full mental image of you. It feels like you’ve been turned into wank-fodder against your choice.

And what the hell can you do against someone who is “just” looking at you. Someone who is willing to block your path or corner you in a spot that you can’t leave while they take their visual fill has already demonstrated that you don’t matter and calling them on their behavior feels more dangerous than telling the stupid cat caller that he’s an ass.

I’m not saying you shouldn’t notice attractive people. I do that all the time. But I have never interrupted someone else’s day so that I could get my visual kicks. I have never impeded someone’s movement. A Look Up involves making sure the person you are looking at knows that they are being looked at and can’t escape it. That is not flattering, it’s just one of the thousand ways woman are treated as objects instead of people.


Unknown said...

I wonder what those guys would do if you lowered your shoulder and plowed through them while they were gandering? Not much is my guess, especially if you could get a bag swinging in the general direction of their crotches.

The Red Queen said...

If I am in a situation to do so, I do just plow past them. I don't know any woman who would purposely get within touching distance of this kind of guy though- they also tend to be the grabby ones.

I think you're missing the point about it being dangerous- you either endure the 30 second stare down or call them on it and risk much worse. Trust me- what I would really like to do is grab their sack and twist till they cry while commenting on their inadequacy in size.