Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Yes, Virginia there are people who don't believe in adoption

Jezebel oh fucking Jezebel. When all I want is to get some trashy gossip with a funfeminist spin, you go and pull some stupid ass shit. There is a reason that I have to put warning labels up every time I link to you.

Tracy Egan Morrisey, writing at the above mentioned Jezebel is SHOCKED OMG GRAB THE SMELLING SALTS that someone might not believe in adoption.

I don't. Well, I believe that adoption happens. It's not the same as not believing in Santa Claus or the Tooth Fairy. And I am pro-to my bones and the depth of my (crooked) uterus- choice. But I think that adoption is the last possible option that should be considered. I think that it is the worst kind of betrayal, to know that the person(s) that were supposed love you most in the world, don't want you at all (while I was not adopted, I can tell y'all about what an awful feeling that is for a kid. Lived it.) But I am a pragmatist, and I understand that there needs to be a way for children with no parents (or with awful parents) to have a loving family. So I am not all "burn down social services and protest adoption organizations" about it.

That there are people, like me, who don't think adoption is the universal good it's made out to be should not come as a great big fucking surprise. There are people who don't think abortion is all the great either and would never choose it for themselves, yet still think abortion should be accessible and legal for those who would choose it. There are also lots of interracial adoptees who aren't so keen on the whole adoption thing either.

Now as for what Tracy is describing regarding the show 16 and Pregnant, that's probably closer to reproductive coercion. From the description, the teenage father seems to be a complete and utter asshat who has no interest in raising his own kid but "doesn't believe in adoption". So his teenage girlfriend sits at home, struggling to raise a baby with the help of her mom, while he cheats and is verbally abusive.

(And for the record, 35% of teenage pregnancies end in abortion. Yet almost all the teens on 16 and Pregnant choose to either parent or give their babies up for adoption. There was one special about abortion that MTV did regarding this show. It's this kind of skewing that makes it easier for forced pregnancy blowhards to get laws passed.)

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