Things that are made of lose

So you all know my other secret passion is interior design and architecture? Maybe not. It is a wee bit (more than a wee bit) like lottery shopping, or things I would buy if I had money. And I'm a wee bit ashamed of it because, you know, it's all part of the spectacle. Then I justify it to myself by saying "it's not like I have a house. If I had a house, then I might not spend so much time imagining a house". So yeah, I give myself a pass on the lottery shopping bit because of poverty. Sue me, I ain't perfect.

That was all a long into to explain why I was looking for window coverings that aren't ugly. I was wondering if they made films for windows like they make wall decals, in some fab modernist design.

I have absolutely no idea if they do, because as soon as I saw this the guffaw went off in my head and I was bowled over by the stupidity.

(You know how I said people are rational actors, I still mean that, right up until the time the bong smoke pickles their melon or the 3rd vodka tonic goes to work. That's kind of the point of most mind altering substances, to make you stop being rational).

So imagine this. You are a pot head, a wake and baker, the kind of person who doesn't get out of bed without taking a toke. But right by your bed is a giant window looking out onto the street and you really don't want to get busted by some random cop who happens to see you taking your first morning puff. But you're also a minimalist. You hate curtains, or you're like me and you hate mini blinds, plantation blinds or pretty much any mechanism which is going to leave bar shaped objects over your natural light source thus rendering your home into a glorified chicken coop. So you go searching for another solution.

I give you cannabis leaf window film.


So now instead of the off chance that random Officer Bob catches you taking a long bong toke through the window, you have the guarantee that every cop in the neighborhood plus anyone else who cares knows not only that you are a massive stoner, but you have killed so many of your short term memory cells that you forgot that advertising your pot smoking is probably more likely to get you busted than just getting over your fear of curtains.

And if you're more a drug of the masses type, they've also got you covered. As long as your drug is Jesus flavored. Or your initial is a T.