Wednesday, October 18, 2006

No one is dead yet

Three days in and no one is dead or even slightly mutilated. I haven't even yelled at the monkey boy (which is why I quit trying to quit the last time I tried to quit- I was bordering on Joan Crawford levels of scary).

I have this sudden massive swell of energy. I woke up at 6:30 this morning to clean my carpets. I was going to use the carpet cleaner, but instead I got a bucket of hot soapy water and a giant scrub brush and started cleaning the carpet by hand. If I hadn't just quit smoking I would think that I am bi-polar and in the midst of a manic phase. Seriously, who scrubs their entire living room carpet by hand? I got about half-way done this morning and am going to finish tonight. Then I am scrubbing the walls.

And just like DeeK said, my sense of smell has gotten much better. It was pretty good before. I could tell if a car has transmission or antifreeze problems by smell. I have a baker's nose and can sense the fine line when cookies are just done without being burnt on the bottom. I can usually figure out the scents that make up someone's perfume.

But having my sense of smell increase is not actually a good thing. I tried to eat an almost Cobb salad at lunch today (almost Cobb because there was no avocado). The smell of the blue cheese and green onions was overpowering. I love cheese, even blue cheese, but I fear that the intensity of the smells may put me off it forever. And then there is the bus, oh my god. I have been riding the bus for the last 3 years since I gave up my car and got a plush job a seven minute walk from my house. I got on the bus the other day and I thought I would be done in by the smells. It was an unholy combination of cheap cologne, dirty feet, vomit, urine and bad breath. It was like climbing into the body of a homeless giant. Needless to say, I've been walking a lot more.

There is one more weird thing. I am not having the smoking dreams yet, or waking up in the middle of the night dying for a cigarette. Instead I am craving weird food. Last night I woke up a 3am with an unquenchable desire for these chocolate covered cherries I get at Christmas every year from our friends in Atlanta.

I am sure you are all thrilled to bits to be reading the diary of a girl trying to quit smoking (insert knowing look of snark here). But just like any junkie it is still a minute by minute struggle not to think about smoking. I have been smoking everyday since I was 14, more than half my life. I read that the relapse rate for smokers is 95%, same as heroin junkies. Since this is at least my 10th time trying to quit, I am hopeful that I actually get to be in the 5% this time. Hell, I am in the 20% of Americans who have a passport, the 10% who read a book weekly, the 9% who are either Agnostic or Atheist. Since I like being in the minority, I think I belong in the 5%.

2 comments:

Wonder said...

well, at least with the walking more thing you might sidestep the weight-gain thing (if that's of any interest)

tradeoffs..... ;)

I'm glad no-one's dead yet...
And that you're quitting (yay!)

DeeK said...

you go girl!

You are a non-smoker now. Yes, look on your former smoking comrades with disdain, because you are better than they are (Okay, you're not, but it makes not smoking easier). And just think of the money you'll save. No it won't get you out of poverty, but its one less thing you will need to scramble up money for.

Yes, the bus is a plethora of odor, but it won't kill you unless you stand in front of it whil eits moving!