Wednesday, September 01, 2010

the hardest thing i've ever done

i quit smoking (again) a little more than 3.5 days ago. this is
probably attempt number 12 in the 20 years i've been smoking, and i am
more (cautiosly) optimistic about my success this time. i'm using the
gum, which tastes like ass and leaves my mouth a painful blistered
wreck, so at least quitting the gum will be easy. i haven't killed
anyone yet, or even yelled at anyone, but i do feel myself to be
lacking my normal level of sympathy. i think it would be easier to
give up food and water than to give up smoking, but it turns out i'm
not really suicidal and surprise, if i'm going to live a long life i
would rather not do it strapped to an oxygen tank. my lungs already
feel a little better. since i have 11.5 weeks of gum smacking ahead of
me, donations of nicorette 4mg gum would be deeply appreciated. it
would suck to run out of gum and have to bum a smoke to compensate.
oddly, not smoking is temporarilly more expensive than smoking, but
there is a light at the end of the tunel.

The trouble with being poor is that it takes up all of your time.
Willem de Kooning

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